When the Bear Isn’t There: Healing from Trauma’s False Alarms
Let’s set the scene: You’re hiking in the woods, and out of nowhere, a bear charges at you. Your body flips into survival mode—you’re running, heart pounding, adrenaline flooding your system. You survive the encounter, but the story doesn’t end there. Every crack of a twig or rustle of leaves afterward has you on edge, wondering if another bear is lurking.
Now, here’s the thing: the bear isn’t always a bear. Sometimes it’s a bunny, but your body doesn’t care. It reacts like it’s life or death every single time. That’s what trauma does—it keeps your body stuck in survival mode, even when the danger is long gone.
Trauma’s Wild Ride
Trauma isn’t limited to actual bear attacks (though, if you’ve survived one, you’ve got my respect). It’s any overwhelming event that leaves you feeling powerless, whether that’s an abusive relationship, assault, war, or natural disasters. For Black women, trauma often overlaps with the constant stress of racism, sexism, and societal expectations to “push through” no matter what.
Your body learns to protect you by staying hyper-alert, scanning for danger where it doesn’t exist. You’re not paranoid—it’s your nervous system doing its job. But living in survival mode 24/7? Exhausting.
When the Bear Becomes a Bunny
Here’s the rub: not every rustling leaf is a bear. But trauma doesn’t let you relax enough to figure that out. Your body’s fight, flight, or freeze response kicks in automatically. Over time, those alarms get louder and more frequent, until every little thing feels like a life-threatening event.
For me, trauma turned ordinary moments into battlegrounds. The world felt full of invisible threats. My heart raced, my palms sweat, and my mind was constantly in overdrive. Even in safe spaces, I struggled to convince my body to believe it.
How Do We Stop Hulking Out?
Healing from trauma is like retraining your brain to tell the difference between bears and bunnies. It’s not easy, but it’s possible. Here’s how:
Create a Sense of Safety: Before anything else, remind yourself you’re safe. Surround yourself with people, places, and practices that ground you.
Activate Your Chill Button: Trauma keeps you in high alert, but deep breathing can help bring you back down. Try diaphragmatic breathing—inhale deeply through your nose, let your belly expand, then exhale slowly through your mouth. It’s simple but powerful.
Get Curious About Your Triggers: What’s setting off your alarms? Loud noises? Certain smells? Once you know your triggers, you can start to work through them instead of letting them control you.
Learn to Pause: When you feel the alarm bells ringing, give yourself a moment to pause. Take a deep breath, and ask yourself: Is this a bear, or could it be a bunny?
Therapy Is Key: Working with a therapist—especially one trained in trauma—can help you untangle the web of triggers and find tools that actually work for you.
The Power of Breath and Support
Deep breathing might sound like a cliché, but trust me, it works. It’s one of the quickest ways to activate your parasympathetic nervous system—the part of your body that says, Hey, you’re okay. It doesn’t erase the trauma, but it gives you a moment of calm in the storm.
And listen, don’t try to do this alone. Healing isn’t a solo journey. A qualified therapist can help you identify your triggers, develop coping strategies, and reprogram your nervous system.
Reflection Prompt
What are the “bears” in your life that might actually be “bunnies,” and how can you start to tell the difference?
Trauma might have trained you to live in survival mode, but healing is about reclaiming your peace. You don’t have to live in fear of a bear that’s no longer there. It’s time to rewire your alarms and embrace the safety you deserve.
Rooting for your healing,
Dr. Brooklyn Chick 🌱✨
